Prof. Martin Seligman and his students at UPen were discussing whether happiness comes from practicing kindness or having “fun”. An assignment was decided to be done before the next class – each one would engage in one pleasurable activity and one activity of philanthropy, and write detailed reports about both. The findings were life-changing for the students – they found that the pleasure of engaging in fun activities, like hanging out with friends, watching a movie or eating ice cream paled in comparison to the feelings that they experienced after performing a kind act. After engaging in an act of kindness, some found that the whole day just became better, while others experienced that they were able to listen better, became more mellow and were more liked by others.
This small classroom experiment highlights an important insight about happiness. Yet much of modern life is guided by a very different philosophy—hedonism, which suggests that human behaviour is primarily motivated by maximizing pleasure and minimizing pain. Hedonism is a way of life for people for whom pleasure plays an important role. So, hedonists are always up for a good time, and their motto would probably be “YOLO – you only live once!” And, like the old hippie slogan goes – “If it feels good, do it!” The over emphasis on pursuing pleasure and avoiding pain could lead to self-indulgence and a plethora of short-cuts to pleasure – drugs, chocolate, alcohol, shopping and binge-watching to name a few. This pursuit of pleasure, via short-cuts, rather than by engaging in meaningful activity eventually leaves the person feeling empty and depressed.
The problem with hedonism can be looked at from two perspectives – on an individual level as well as from the point of view of the society and environment. Firstly, we humans have a tendency to quickly adapt to good things and take them for granted. The things that made us happy yesterday, are not making us equally happy today; today we need something better, bigger to feel the same level of happiness. But when we get the next big “high” we adapt to it as well. The pleasure fades, leaving us unsatisfied and gives rise to an urge to seek even stronger stimuli. There is a strong probability that this could lead to addiction and risky experimentation.
The environmental argument is that hedonism gives rise to self-indulgence, which smothers awareness and rational thinking, thus leading to over-consumption. This in turn would lead to depletion of natural resources thus hastening destruction of the environment. As an example, chasing constant novelty, the urge to “keep up” and for quick gratification, many of us indulge in fast fashion, purchasing cheap clothes frequently, excessive to our needs. This worldwide practice is contributing to resource depletion (water, cotton, synthetic fibres) as well as significant pollution due to textile production and waste. Also, hedonic self-indulgence makes us focus on personal pleasure and immediate gratification, and lose sight of social obligations. We tend to become less empathetic and less concerned about the well-being of others. Self-absorption leads to weakening of social bonds and community spirit. To conclude, spending excessive time and money on self-indulgence leaves no scope for building meaningful relationships, or virtue activities like philanthropy.
Pleasure isn’t really the enemy of happiness. But when it becomes a primary compass guiding our choices, it CAN lead us away from truly living a fulfilling and flourishing life. The purpose, hence, is not to eliminate pleasure, but balance it with meaning, engagement, compassion and responsibility – towards ourself, our family, the society and the planet. When we shift our focus from not just feeling good, but to doing good and being good, the happiness that follows is not fleeting, but enduring.
Here’s to pursuing not just pleasure, but a life of meaning and flourishing!
Dr. Vaishali Marathe (Ph.D)
References:
Seligman, M.E.P., Authentic Happiness, Hachette, 2002
Lyubomirsky, S., Sheldon, K. M., & Schkade, D. (2005). Pursuing Happiness: The Architecture of Sustainable Change. Review of General Psychology, 9(2), 111–131. https://doi.org/10.1037/1089-2680.9.2.111
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